How to Cut Your Chances Of Being Published In Half

Do you write guest posts for other blogs but can’t seem to get anyone to say yes? This is the first blogging lesson designed specifically to make your life twice as hard, cut your back-links by half, and reduce your potential earnings by as much as fifty percent. If you’re already engaging the elements below, congratulations, you’re well on your way to sabotaging yourself! Before we begin this course, let’s look at a life lesson that will change your motoring habits forever.

Do you know the best way to halve your car’s chance of getting scratched while parked at a public car park? Forget parking close to the entrance! If you want to cut the chances of your car being scratched by as much as half, park next to a wall or a pillar. Now I’ve said it to you this makes perfect sense, right? This is no magic formula. If you make it difficult for people to get round one side of your car, they can’t scratch it.

Apply this to your writing, and let’s see how you can throw a ‘pillar-punch’ at your productivity. Please note: ‘pillar-punch’ is a word created specifically for this post. It means writing in such a way as to erect a blockage against the finished work. You’ve seen it first here on YPP!

Write without an audience in mind

So you’ve got your eye on a big blog in your niche. You’d give anything to see your name and article on their pages. Here are some ways you can halve your chances and pillar-punch your likelihood of ever being published there.

  • Read only 5 articles on the blog. Better yet, just skim those articles, but best of all, read only the headings of the posts written by other guest bloggers without reading their stuff. If you don’t know what that pro blogger accepts from other writers, you’ll never know what he/she might accept from you.
  • Don’t pay any attention to the comments on the blog posts. This is perfect because you’ll never know how the people who interact with that blog think, what they’re like or what sort of questions they ask.
  • Whatever you do, never, ever look at what’s hot on that blog on which you want to guest post. This will definitely halve – if not kill your chances of being published there. If you don’t know what the existing readers are finding helpful, you won’t know what topics the blog owner wants to concentrate on in the future – too perfect.
  • Definitely write longer posts than the blog usually publishes. After all, the blogger would’ve worked for years to research what kind of posts his/her audience is comfortable reading. You jumping in and boring the guts out of them is just what your post needs for a good, sound, pillar-punch.

Write sloppy articles

This is one of the best ways to halve your chances of publishing your guest post. Blogs that have great articles are wallowing in Internet sawdust as we speak. If they are not being read, what chances has a blog with sloppy writing got? So, okay, many Americans may not like my turn of phrases because most of them are British. This is not what I’m referring to (nor am I addressing the way I spell ‘colour’). I’m talking about publishing posts with little or no helpful information and writing articles which haven’t been given the once-over for grammatical and/or spelling mistakes. Here are some sure ways of slapping your guest post with a generous dose of that famous pillar-punch.

  • Write all your articles about the same thing. Spin them then try to pass them off on every blog you’d like to guest post on.
  • And here’s one of the key factors (you mustn’t forget this one). Whiplash into a writing-frenzy and never take the time to edit your posts. Your pro blogger friend – the one whose blog you want to publish on – will edit your posts for you. Oh yes he/she will! It’s their blog after all. Any less-than-perfect editing work will reflect negatively on their business, not yours. This is one thing that never fails when it comes to rejecting guest posts on my blogs. If I’ve got to practically re-write the article, I won’t accept it.
  • Go over the blogger’s published articles. Copy one of his/her own points on every article he/she’s published on a particular topic, and present them as a unique piece of your work. Bloggers tend to forget their own original creations, so will never suspect foul-play when you turn up with thoughts resembling their own.

Resort to shameless tactics

If you can’t cut your chances of being published by half with any of the above ways, these points below will certainly do the trick. Shameless tactics won’t ever let you down.

  • Send your blogger in question a guest post request littered with cut and paste material you’ve used elsewhere. Feel free to use various fonts of different sizes and colours in the same email. Pillar-punch your letter with spelling mistakes and grammatical issues. You can’t take time to write a 100-word letter, but you’ll definitely take time to write an 800-word post. Big time bloggers are ‘down with this’.
  • Send a guest post request letter to your blogger telling them you’ve read and followed the blog for ages and explain how much you admire their work. You can explain that the reason they’ve never heard of you is not because you’ve never wanted to leave a comment on their blog. It’s just because you’re a shy, retiring kind of creature. Just like ‘chicks’, bloggers dig that jazz.
  • Address your guest-post request letter to ‘Webmaster’ or ‘Blogger’. Bloggers – especially the big guys and gals – love to be called Webmaster. It makes them feel respected. It’s like a ‘Lordship’ or something – only more special.

We’ve come to the end of our course on how to cut your chances of being published by half. This is the best course of this nature online. Follow this and your guest post may never be published again.

Please note: conditions may apply, refunds and tissues not included.

Anne Lyken-Garner is a published author, freelance writer, blogger and editor. She writes for, and manages 4 blogs and edited The Writers Bureau online student magazine for 2 years. You can read more about Anne at her writing blog, A Blogger’s Books, where you can check out her How To Write An Article series and her inspirational book, Sunday’s Child. 

About the Author

  • http://getmobilefun.com Techbogy Rocky @Latest Mobile Reviews

    Unique ideas for bloggers like me..too awesome info which I will share with my other friends who do blogging..

    • http://www.abloggersbooks.com Anne @ writing site

      Techbogy, I hope you’re not taking them (the ideas) literally. :-)

  • http://www.aha-now.com Harleena Singh

    Nice to see you here Anne, and with such a wonderful post!

    Oh yes…if any of us is going to write this ways, our work is never going to get published anywhere! Speaking of which I still need to get started with guest blogging myself, so these tips are a sure no-no for me, whenever I do start. :)

    Thanks for sharing. :)

    • http://www.abloggersbooks.com Anne @ writing site

      Hi Harleena, Thanks for your comment. Let me know when you’re ready to start guest posting, please. I’m sure your work will be very useful for my relationship and build confidence blogs.

      • http://www.aha-now.com Harleena Singh

        Will do Anne :)

        I do have lots of people already asking me and all I need to do now is get started. And then head over and do up my writing blog too. :)

        • http://www.abloggersbooks.com Anne @ writing site

          :-) I still haven’t used that parenting article I wrote for your blog. I just haven’t had time to look for other blogs that deal with parenting.

          Have a great week-end.

          • http://www.aha-now.com Harleena Singh

            Don’t worry – I am starting off with guest blogging from next week on my blog, and would take that back again from you pretty soon. :)

            Enjoy your weekend too. :)

  • http://youpreneurs.blogspot.com/ Samuel Murimi

    Wow!Anne you know how to pass the message right.

    I started Young Preneurs Strategist two weeks ago and I have been reading so much on how to improve it and get traffic.

    I want to use “guest post” strategy to improve traffic.

    Your article is an eye opener. Thank you.

    • http://www.abloggersbooks.com Anne @ writing site

      Hi Samuel, Good luck with your new blog. I know you’ll do well if you use the opposites of all the points I raised here.

  • http://www.mobileapptycoon.com Thomas @ Mobile App Tycoon

    Love this type of post – humorous and helpful :)

    Thomas

    • http://www.abloggersbooks.com Anne @ writing site

      Hi Thomas, I love teaching with humour as a vehicle. I think it has a great impact and hope that I’ve managed to do some good with this article.

  • http://hightechnovation.com Ruan | HighTechNovation

    Hi Anne,

    Well, I never thought I’d say this in my life. This is one of the most enjoyable posts I’ve read about getting published elsewhere with not a single intention of implementing ANY of the ‘advice’ given! ;)

    Being a regular contributor to kikolani.com, WeBlogBetter and soon to be Pro Blogging Success, this was very entertaining which had me smile more than once.

    Lovely! Easiest course to ‘follow’ ever!

    • http://www.abloggersbooks.com Anne @ writing site

      Great, Ruan. I’m sure that with your extensive experience in guest posting you can vouch for all the points raised here. Have you got other not-to-do guest post ideas?

      • http://hightechnovation.com Ruan | HighTechNovation

        Actually I have one important not-to-do tactic to add to your ‘course’.

        A sure-fire pillar punch you can throw at guest posting proposals which will have you rejected within an instance is to make your clear intentions of self-promotion as obvious as possible.

        Yes all guest bloggers want exposure and promotion from their guest posts to a certain degree. I mean the over-all intention of guest posting is to gain trust and establish credibility within another audience and ultimately to have them be interested to see more of you and your work.

        However, this can be established by focusing on delivering extensive value in the post instead of tons of links back to your own content, using examples that only redirect the readers back to your products or services etc.

        Give them valuable content, don’t be scared to over deliver and you’ll have them come your way anyway.

        • http://www.abloggersbooks.com Anne @ writing site

          That first paragraph is hilarious! Of course, you’re right. I’m jealous I didn’t include this point in my article :-)

          • http://hightechnovation.com Ruan | HighTechNovation

            Nah I’m sure on another day you would have included it. :)

  • http://www.deep-think.org Lanre

    This post simply says one thing, “implement at your peril”. The first time I read it, my mouth hung open halfway through the article.

    It’s a nice angle and definitely a sure way of telling potential guest bloggers what not to do. Many of us are already making some of the mistakes outlined in this post.

    If I’m not mistaken, this is the first of its kind on YoungPrePro.
    Nice one Anne!

    • http://www.abloggersbooks.com Anne @ writing site

      Definitely, Lanre! Implement at your peril. I hope I didn’t shock you too much:-) I used to tell my Sunday School students this: mistakes can be things we DO, but sometimes they are things we DON’T DO. There are mistakes of commission and those of omission.

      I think we can learn from both approaches. I just wanted to bring something slightly different to the table.

  • http://www.miraculousladies.com June

    Anne, I love the angle you approached this from. I couldn’t stop smiling as I was reading. It was extremely entertaining and educational at the same time.

    I’ll make sure not to follow the rules in your unique course.

    Fantastic article! :-)

    • http://www.abloggersbooks.com Anne @ writing site

      HI June. Absolutely don’t follow any of the advice in the article. Just do the total opposite of whatever it says! :-)

  • Andrea

    I was just referred to this website and instead of doing what I wa supposed to do, I read the entire book of Bamidele on one go. Now I saw this article Anne thank you and popped to your site. Thank you for the information. Actually got totally distracted by the two of you. But it is a good distraction. Will read more in your site.

    • http://www.abloggersbooks.com Anne @ writing site

      Thanks for the visit, Andrea. I know there’s tons on this site – and on mine – to keep you positively distracted for a decade :-)

  • http://www.careermomonline.com/ Maricel

    I was editing a guest post my blogger in question asked me to modify when I chanced upon this article. I must say, if there’s anything that works like a charm, it’s reverse psychology. Wonderful writing!

    • http://www.abloggersbooks.com Anne @ writing site

      Thanks, Maricel,
      I’m sure that guest post in question got a battering of its life (to check for all the pillar punching I mentioned).

      • http://www.careermomonline.com/ Maricel

        It sure did.

        And if I may add, one surefire pillar-punch is to take the “too self-promotional” route. That will get you the ax in no time.

  • http://www.workfromhomechristians.com.au/is-nutriverus-really-as-good-as-they-are-saying/ James Hannan

    Thanks Anne Lyken-Garner…. Nice post indeed.

  • http://bloggingpills.com Gilbert Samuel

    i really love this, i even have a guest post for youngprepro but i don’t know how to, what do i do

  • http://onineincometeacher.com/ Matt Smith

    Great post Anne!

    Wish some of the people that submit posts to my site would read this first. From a publishers point of view I get so frustrated by some of rubbish that people send in. The thing is, you can spot them a mile away. I can usually tell if a post is going to be good or not by reading their email. Most of the time they are only interested in getting a link back to their site, the actual post is the second concern to them.

    From a writers perspective, I think you hit the nail on the head. If you are wanting to get a post accepted, then do some research on the site first. Find out what sort of posts they publish already, how they write their posts, what subjects do they cover, etc. That way, when you come to write the post, you have a better chance of getting it published.

    I just hope people read this post and learn from it. Great job Anne! :)

    • http://www.abloggersbooks.com Anne @ writing site

      Thanks, Matt.

      You’re exactly right. The introductory email says it all!

      Just send perspective guest posters a link to this article as a tongue-in-cheek intro to getting published on your site :-)

  • http://www.coloryourlifepublished.com Flora Morris Brown, Ph.D.

    Anne,

    Thanks for this hilarious article. You have hit on all the major mistakes would-be guest posters make when they sabotage themselves. These tips are a great checklist of what NOT to do.